Wednesday, October 2, 2013

A Few Things I Will Never Regret Giving My Children

There are a few simple things in life that I will never in a million years regret giving our children.
They are pretty simple...but I hope that they look back later in life and realize that they were gifts :).
And even though I falter daily, I pray that my children remember the good and that I tried to be ever present in the moment with them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 A Slowed Life  I will never feel bad that we were not a part of the rat race. Our life is simple and we want our children to know that a hurried life can be a wasted life. So...no...my kids are not involved in every sport, music lesson, dance lesson, or busy bopping from one friend's house to the next everyday. We are home. With one another. With lots of time for creativity and talking, learning values, and cherishing our family, friends, and neighbors. And even though that may sound like there is no opportunity to "develop" a child into someone well rounded....that is a misconception. We have a rule of "one thing at a time"....and let's do that well. Too many things/activities on a plate can hinder performance, too!


 Telling Them I Love Them   I think this three letter phrase is one of the most important. They need to hear it daily, hourly, at bed time, and more importantly when they have made mistakes. We want our children to know how unconditionally loved they are...no matter what.






Forgiveness  That we forgive and move on. No holding grudges, no retaliation. In fact, we try to encourage "doing the hard thing" and giving the person who wronged you a gift of something nice...a smile, a helping hand, an "I'm sorry." If they get into a habit of holding onto anger...it will follow them for a lifetime.


Looking Into Their Eyes  Nothing in this world tells your child how much you enjoy your time with them than looking right into their eyes. Close the laptop, book, stop folding laundry, and just look at them. I want my kids to have memories of me loving my time with them.
The Value of Hard Work To work without complaint and to put your whole entire heart into the job is an amazing skill. My husband and I see this as a rather lost skill in today's society. Working creates confidence, pride, and teaches kids that a job well done is something to strive for. Our kids know how to do dishes, clean bathrooms, and pick up....they drive tractors, irrigate, and help farm. I want them to grow up knowing how GREAT it is to work hard!

Timeliness This is one of MY personal struggles. I have been working so hard to give my children a better sense that being early is BETTER than being late. Managing time is so important.


Playing With My Kids It is hard for me to stop what I am doing and just play. But I have found over the years that even a few minutes helps us to laugh and enjoy one another. Most of all, the heart strings are strengthened. Playing makes life lighter



Lightening Up The Mood When things start to get a little overwhelming, we pray together, and then lighten up the mood with joyful music, a board game, read a book, or just go outside and take a walk. Sometime just a good old fashioned laugh together makes everything better!


Praising Oh how this one is so important! It is easy to find fault...for anyone. But PRAISING for a job well done, noticing a kind act, a thoughtful word. This builds confidence.


Contentment Learning to be happy with what you have and not place so much emphasis on what you don't have. Most of the time, many of our wants are just that...something to want. Does it make life better? Is it a need? I think contentment creates happiness. I want my children to have that as they grow!


Hugs Lots of hugs each day. It has been tested and proven that children do not reach their full potential without lots of hugs throughout the day. It just makes us all feel good!


Giving to Others I want my kids to be givers. So we look for opportunities to give of ourselves in our family, maybe a neighbor in need, or even to a friend who is upset. Nursing homes are a great way to give to those who are shut in....or my favorite...the local Food Bank. To know that Christ gave to the "least of these" and that those people are just like you and I. I want my kids to have compassion and know that treating others with compassion is so important.


Showing Them a Mom Who is Happy I want them to remember me as more than a Mom who provided and tried to give them a wonderful childhood. I want them to remember a Mom who smiled, tried new things, laughed, and loved being with her kids...not one who looked on everything as drudgery.


Encouraging Them to Try New Things I never want my children to be afraid to get their hands dirty and try new things. That is how we grow and become better. Mistakes are GOOD. We encourage them when trying something new. Perseverance and determination are good attributes trying something new requires a little of both!


The Fact That I Love Their Dad  I want them to know how much I love their Dad. Even through hard times, I hope that I show them what a blessing marriage is and how wonderful it can be! I want them to know that we are together on every aspect and that our family is meaningful and a blessing. I hope that we can not only build up those within our family, but that our family spreads that love to those around us.


That Being Different is GOOD Having strong morals and values really does make you different sometimes. We have really emphasized to our kids that it is a GOOD thing. Staying strong, having common sense to do the right thing in the face of adversity takes strength. You have to be different to go against the grain. But we want our kids strong and usually that quality inspires others to take the right path.


Morals and Values  We talk about morals and values everyday. What is right and wrong and why. I want my kids to be strong in a world that can present some pretty tough decisions. Most of all, I think a strong sense of morals and values develops a lot of commonsense. Common sense is a great skill to have in life :).


If You Don't Have a Faith, Life is 10 Times Harder  My utmost goal is to have my children know Christ. I want them to lean on Him in every aspect of their life. Without Him...life is so much harder! I want them to start their day with prayer and end it with prayer.



~Julia

17 comments:

Erika Roberts said...

Oh Julia. This is good. And needs to be taught and practiced and made important in parents' lives. Oh such a great reminder! Thank you! (again) for saying what God put on your heart to say.

Gumbo Lily said...

Well said and well done! Those are the very best of gifts. One day your children will thank you if they haven't already.

~Jody

EMMA said...

What child could want for anything more.

Anonymous said...

Oh, this is so well said and so
very needed today! Thank you
Julie, for these reminders of what's really important for our children
and ourselves...always needing to be reminded of these things!
Corinne
love the photos of your family....precious indeed!

PAM said...

amen!

Bevy @ Treasured Up and Pondered said...

This is beautiful. You are beautiful. And because You are, they are!!

What a BEAUTIFUL family... all around.

Blessings on your day.
~Bevy

Francesca Meazza Passionedeco said...

this post is one to keep and read and read again.
Thank you
Fra

Christine said...

You have a wonderful family and you're such a good mother and your husband is a good father. Your children will grow up with exceptional character that is very, very rare in this world we have to live in for now. They have something money cannot buy and live in a wholesome environment with all that wide open space and clean air.
You and your family are truly blessed.

Kristina Swain said...

I love what you wrote and everything you said is what I want my kids to know also. Thank you for the reminder. Blessings Kristina

Kristina Swain said...

Everything you wrote is what i want my kids to know.Thak you for the reminder. Blessings, Kristina

LeslieWms said...

This post is beautiful. My grandchildren are coming to spend the weekend and we are going to talk about these ideas -- while putting in the winter garden and planning Christmas gifts to start. Thanks for the thoughtful reminder.

Jennifer said...

What a great list~to be aware and intentional of all you are sowing into your children and family!

Alicia Grant said...

I appreciate your post. It is so nice to know by reading that and the comments that we are not alone. You said it well

Sherri said...

Well said my friend. I believe that if more people taught these values to their children this world would be a much better place. We too tried to instill these things into our daughter. Now that she is in college, she has learned that "different is better" first hand. She has actually called home to tell me just how "confused" others seem. She is an only child who was home schooled & yet her professors have sent us numerous emails asking us how we managed to raise such a focused, well rounded, hard working young lady with so much self confidence, drive, & passion for life. Most of my replies sound just like your post. No one ever could convince me that what you've just written is not the best thing for our children.

Tessa said...

Your family is blessed.

Your blog is lovely.

Your photography is amazing.

Gentle hugs,
Tessa~

Nicole said...

This is wonderful! I will come back to this often - thanks for posting it.

Sara said...

Thank you

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